Weekend Derailed by my Kids' Weird Stages

You ever have one of those days where you have huge plans, then a series of unfortunate events causes your productivity to come to a screeching halt? Yeah, that's been my weekend.

I'm supposed to be sunning diapers, making freezer meals, and sorting kids clothes to pull out everything too small to donate and sell.

Instead, I finished a book series, .....

Actually, that was the height of my weekend productivity.

I think a large part of my derailed efficiency is that my kids have turned into demon spawn. (not literally, but DEFINITELY figuratively)

Lost my Beach Virginity

Yep, you read that right. I have LOST my Beach Virginity.

I bet you didn't know that this was a real thing, right? But it totally is. See, I am in a land-locked state. The closest beach is easily a 4-5 hour drive. Growing up, I went on ONE trip where the bus I was on drove by the ocean. I was about 12 years old and I swear that the beach and waves laughed at me as I passed it with puppy dog eyes.

Also, my family never went on vacations when I was a child. Like, no beach, no camping, no trips to the mountains, no amusement parks, etc. I went on a few school trips (like the one where the beach mocked me as I passed) and weekends with friends, but not an actual family vacation.

Mother's Day 2012

First of all, YES, I know that Mother's Day was 2 months ago and I am WAY late. But I have lots to talk about and lots to show you, so DEAL with it.

This year, I had a pretty rocking Mother's Day. And I have all the pictures to prove it. So be prepared to be PHOTOBOMBED!

10 Parenting Principles I Wish I'd Known: Episode Seven

7) You are Not Your Parents

Ok, so we have already went over how your children are not you in my last episode.

Now we are going to discuss how you are not your parents.

And I know what you are going to say:
"But, I know so many people who are JUST like their mom/dad!"
Well, that's great!

My point is: It doesn't have to be.

Shhhh...I've Been In Hiding

Hello All! I know I have been MIA for a while now. And I have a really good excuse.

I have entered the Wit-Sec program. Yep. Inspector Mary Shannon is my new BFF.

I also wax poetic with Marshall.

Yep. So that's been me. REALLY busy. Being snarky with Mary and clever with Marshall.

Ok, not really. I mean, I have been busy, but not hanging with Mary & Marshall.

I WISH. ~le sigh~

In all reality, I have been slammed. I had Mother's Day stuff, then end of school year stuff, then OMG I'M GOING TO THE BEACH stuff, then I had a workshop, and now I still have to fully unpack from the beach.

I have officially become one of those bloggers that have MILLIONS of ideas for blog posts, but just don't have the time to sit down and bring them to life. So I figure that the best thing to do is check in and let you guys know what I have in the works.

Coming Attractions

Mother's Day- Yes, I know that I'm over a month late to post about it. So what?

School Supply Cakes- I totally got my craft on and did school supply cakes for Sassy and Diva's teachers. Because I rock.

Beach- I had never been to the beach. My children had never been to the beach. So I have LOTS to tell you about the beach. These posts may take a bit, considering that I still haven't fully unpacked. Like, my trunk is still half-full. And I haven't even posted my pics to my FB. So...be patient.

Birthdays- There have been a few birthdays recently, so I will update you on who is older.

Workshop- I have a few ideas burning in my mind related to the baby food workshop that was last weekend. Not sure how they will play out, but just throwing that out there.

Father's Day- I feel obligated to do a post on this, since I will be doing a post about Mother's Day. Not that Hubby reads my blog, but I would feel guilty. Stupid Mommy Guilt is spilling over into Marital Guilt. What the crap?!

Boobies, Vaginas, and Babies- Yep, pretty sure I'll post at least a little about that.

So now that we are caught up at least a little, I'm going to check out again. Mostly because I have finished eating my lunch and need to get back to working since I am at work.

Oh, final thought. Tomorrow is West Virginia Day. I have tons of clients nationwide that I deal with through work and they always ask me what West Virginia Day is. So I will do my little part to educate the masses.

Here's a link to learn more about West Virginia Day. Consider yourself, as my father-in-law would say, Edu-ma-cated.

In My Daughter's Eyes...

I went to my last Mother's Day Tea on May 10th. Ok, not my last ever, but my last for a while. My children's elementary school does a Mother's Day Tea for the Kindergarten and Pre-K classes each year. I went to Sassy's Pre-K Tea, then her Kindergarten Tea, and then Diva's Pre-K tea. And now I have had my last Mother's Day Tea for a while with Diva's Kindergarten Tea since I will not attend another until Monkey is in school in a few years.

It was very cute and very fun. The kids sang, then joined us at the tables to show us all the gifts they had made. You can read all about them in my Mother's Day post that will be coming soon, but one gift really hit a nerve and I thought it deserved it's very own post.

The students each completed a fill-in-the-blank sheet about their moms. This is Diva's sheet:

Very cute, right? But I want to break it down piece by piece, because it shows you exactly how my daughter sees me as a Mom.

10 Parenting Principles I Wish I'd Known: Episode Five

5) Family Time is Important. And Necessary. And Intimidating. But It Shouldn't Be.

Some families have great traditions from early on. Family Game Night. Pizza Night. Movie Night. Lots of things that the family does together that strengthens the bond they share.

Those families are lucky.

Then you have families that struggle to find that family time. Families that get lost in the daily grind of work, school, etc. Families who spend a lot of their "down time" reading and watching TV in separate rooms. Not really the best way to strengthen family bonds.

Many of the families that fall into Category B want to find more meaningful family time, but it can be intimidating.

In today's world, we are flooded with images of "perfect" families. Don't get me wrong, we also see dysfunctional families and lots of other things. But how many times have you been watching TV and run across a show that shows some family spending time together, looking so happy, usually after resolving some big drama much more easily than you ever could in real life. Or seen the same thing in a movie. Or ran across a book or magazine with a magic list of fun things to do with your family. And searching for "fun things to do with my family" yields over 308 million hits on Google.

So many people get stuck trying to figure out the best way to spend time with their family.

Go to the park? Go to a ball game? Go camping? Amusement park? Gardening? Trip out of town? Cooking? Swimming? Scavenger hunt? Game Night? Movies? Zoo? Bowling? Laser Tag? Scrapbook? Play Barbies? Bakugan? Build a fort? Talent Show? Fly a kite?

Feeling overwhelmed yet?

So many people get so caught up in trying to figure out what to DO for family time that they get overwhelmed and end up not doing anything that they feel is "special" family time. Sure, you still spend time together as a family, but you are not doing the activities that make you FEEL like you are getting that special bonding time.

I had always thought that I would be "that mom." You know, the one that bakes cookies with her kids weekly, has family game night once a week, plans a new activity each weekend, etc. We'd go camping one weekend, bowling the next, day trips to the zoo, etc.

Then I had kids. And it can be EXHAUSTING just getting through the daily grind, let alone planning and executing special family time.

Hubby and I both have full-time jobs. He is very involved in several fraternal organizations. I am involved in several things of my own. Sassy and Diva have school. And Monkey is a toddler. 'Nuff said. We have some responsibility or activity almost every weekend. Out of the next 6 weekends, each one has at least 1 major event except one. Evenings during the week involve coming home from work/school, dinner, homework, and bedtime routine. Not a lot of space for additional family activities other than our usually already packed weekends.

So I understand how overwhelming it can be to make time for quality family time. I get it.

But do you know what I have realized?

We don't NEED to plan and execute special family time to HAVE special family time.

It has taken me some time to learn this lesson, mostly because I had all these grand ideas of what quality family time should be. Like when you are in the kitchen and you envision yourself as Julia Child, Anthony Bourdain, or Rachel Ray. And really you are burning grilled cheese and overcooking your pasta.

Let me give you an example. A few weekends ago, we had events and meetings on Saturday. On Sunday, we spent some time at my MIL's in the morning, then had a birthday part early in the afternoon. Afterwards, we had a few hours free until dinnertime. So we decided to get the family out to enjoy the spring weather. Just spur of the moment, we decided to head for a local park.

Nothing fancy.
No big activities.
Just a small playground and a scenic overlook of our city.

We let the kids play on the playground

Monkey monkeyed around with Hubby's help

Sassy struck a pose on one of the cannons

Diva struck a pose on top of the playground

I even tried to get a family photo of all 3 kids. And failed. Monkey looks most unhappy. And slightly constipated.

But it was still a great time. We were there for a little over an hour at a small park less than 10 minutes from our home. It just goes to show you that some of the most special quality family time you will spend is unscripted and spontaneous instead of orchestrated and meticulously planned.

You don't have to make big plans to spend time with your family.

Just DO it and memories will happen.

10 Parenting Principles I Wish I'd Known: Episode Four

4) Frustrations Transform to Teachable Moments

Remember back in the day when you were in high school and you would be heading for the water fountain, only to be cut off by some jerk who then took their time guzzling down water while you waited impatiently? Yeah, that was frustrating.

At least I *thought* that was frustrating. Until I actually had kids.

Now imagine that you were heading for the water fountain and some jerk cut you off, but while you are impatiently waiting you now have a baby crying and a child yelling "I WANT WATER NOW!!!" All while feeling the glare of the judging eyes of everyone around you because you cannot control your kids.

Yes. THAT is frustrating.

Kids make everyday frustrations magnify. And once you have kids, your frustrations will multiply like naughty little bunnies.

It's ok that I'm talking about rabbits multiplying because it is Easter and bunnies are everywhere right now.

Opposites Attract

Opposites attract.
Likes attract also, but aren't nearly as interesting.
When opposites attract, the reaction can create quite a spectacle.

You're probably wondering where I'm going with this. I know I would be. My blog has mostly focused on a few areas of my life where I have developed some "crunch." Or as I refer to it, a little more natural, a little more green, and a whole lot cheaper. So why am I delving into something that seems so far removed from my usual posts?

Because my life is FULL of opposites attracting.
And by that, I mean that Hubby is truly my polar opposite so much of the time.
This causes some conflicts at times. And by conflicts, I mean full on battles in the war that is parenting and life in general.

We are not always on the same page for many of the issues that come up in the course of our marriage, family, and lifestyle. This can cause some...let's call it marital discord.




Marital Discord



10 Parenting Principles I Wish I'd Known: Episode Three

3) You Will Feel a Wide Range of Emotions. At The Same Time.

Before I had children, I had felt a wide range of emotions. I had felt love. Anger. I had been proud of my loved ones. Astonished at their actions. Shocked by their audacity. Frustrated. Flabbergasted and speechless at times. But rarely were these emotions felt concurrently.

Then I had children.

10 Parenting Principles I Wish I'd Known: Episode One

Each of us can look back on our lives and wish we had known something "back then" that we know now. I had read a quote not to long ago that was along the lines of "Better to get the information before the decision instead of getting the information after the decision and regretting the choice that was made."

That got me thinking. I'd already posted before about my perspective on my parenting past. I have no regrets, only experience. But what if I had made different decisions because I had access to different information? What do I wish I had known "back then" that I know to be true in my heart now?

Weight Loss Wednesday- Week 5

Another week bites the dust! Looking back, I don't think I did that bad this past week. I worked out 2 times. I was below my calorie count every day except one, when I only went over 34 calories. So when I hopped on the scale this morning, I was excepting to be down a little, maybe a pound. And the verdict is:

Yep...I'm actually up 0.2lbs from last week.

Tomato Garlic Baked Tilapia

We tried out a new recipe tonight. I loved it, and while it wasn't a huge hit with the entire family, I had enough of a success to make it again. Everyone in my family has very different food personalities. Hubby is very "meat &  potatoes," which makes it hard for me sometimes since I like to add in lots of veggies and fruit. He hates seafood unless it is sushi or unless he is "within a stone's throw of the ocean." I love fish and would love to have it more often.

Sassy loves her carbs, potatoes are the only veggie she will eat and not complain, and she only eats some chicken and salisbury steak. Diva hates most meat unless it is chicken tenders, but loves veggies and will eat her weight in salad. Monkey is my garbage disposal and will literally eat anything I put in front of him.

So, needless to say, trying to find new recipes are difficult in our house. I usually try to compromise and include at least 1 thing that each person will eat, but that usually ends up with us eating the same things over and over.

No Regrets, Only Experience

Yesterday, I was finally using a gift certificate to a salon from my birthday and started making small talk with a stranger. She asked why it had taken me so long to use the gift certificate and I explained that it had been a very busy year since Monkey was born and that I had just not made the time to schedule an appointment.

As many conversations go when children are mentioned, we started talking about my children and that while the stranger did not have any children yet, she shared some details about her nephew. She mentioned how difficult it was sometimes for her sister to have a night out because she was nursing her young baby, which led to me mentioning the monthly Breastfeeding Cafe that I attend and how much it has helped me to have the support and education that it offers.

Monkey's Winter One-Derland

I am currently in party decompression mode. The last few weeks have been quite a whirlwind. We've had some complications, including sick kiddos, furnace on the fritz, and the busted water main. And to add last-minute drama, we had an ice storm hit the night before the party. Oh, and I forgot my camera at home. So the blurry pics are from my phone and the rest are stolen from a friend. But, it still turned out great!

Before this year, I had never heard of the theme "Winter One-Derland." Luckily, many of the ladies in my different mom groups on Facebook used this theme for their parties. Given that it is really a theme you can only do once, I decided to go for it for this year. Snowflakes and snowmen abound!

Weight Loss Wednesday- Week 3

Another week and another pound lost!

We've had some issues this last week at home. Our furnace was not working properly last Friday, causing an impromptu sleepover at Mom's and Mike from Grogg's Heating & Air Conditioning, Inc. to grace us with his presence early Saturday morning. But, Mike did an awesome job and we were back home Saturday after the house warmed back up.

Mind Your Own Vag....

Ok. That was a little blunt. But, seriously people...Mind your OWN Vag.
Let me explain what I mean.

This is a lovely phrase I picked up during my pregnancy with Monkey from an online parenting forum. As all forums go, there was arguing about every single detail regarding the pregnancy and the postpartum stage.

WARNING!
I am going into Exaggeration Mode.

Weight Loss Wednesday- Week 1

And so my journey begins. One year ago today, my Monkey was born. After that date, I did what many typical moms do. I lost a lot of weight, then slowly started packing it back on. Before I realized I was pregnant with Monkey, I had quite the magic algebraic equation to explain the weight I gained after Diva was born:

Sweet tea obsession + Junk food habit + Depo Provera + lack of exercise =

Nicole + 40 lbs (at least)

Monkey's Birth: The Beginning of My Crunchy Journey

My Monkey's actual birthday is tomorrow, but my labor actually started on January 3, 2011. So here is my birth story, explaining what I went through last year on this date and the journey that got me there, culminating with Monkey's birth. Prepare yourself. It is LONG.

The Daycare Meltdown

My Monkey is nearly 1 year old. I returned to work at around 8 weeks postpartum, but I know many women that wait until 1 year or longer if they are able. I have many friends that are looking at getting back in the workforce. For many of us, this means that our babies will be with another provider, whether that be a babysitter, nanny, family member, in-home daycare, or daycare center.

This means that the inevitable will happen: You will go to pick up your child and your poor baby will be a cranky, emotional mess as soon as you get there. It will break your heart. It will make you think they are sad to be leaving their provider instead of being happy to see you. Because, really, WHY would a child who is happy to see Mommy be crying?